Thursday, October 14, 2010

Honesty is the best policy and other ruminations

Today I realized that I CAN still slip into mindless eating habits and of course (because it is mindless) I did not realize that I was doing this until I was well underway. Here is what happened: A couple of times a month we do day care for our grandbabies. My hubby and I split the day so one of us usually works in the morning and the other in the afternoon. It was a beautiful day so when I returned home from work I was feeling like a bike ride. So, hubby hooked up my Burley and off I went with Noah and Hann around the lake and to the play ground while hubs went to work. So far so good.

We came home hungry.

I don’t know about you, but nothing reminds me of raising kids as much as when I am making a lunch of grilled cheese (cheddar on whole wheat and a little butter) with fresh fruit. I must have made this lunch a million times when my kids were growing up and now I do it for the grandbabies. But, what you do not know, is that when my kids were little I would eat their untouched left overs, well because I love grilled cheese but also because I did not want to waste that left over food. So fast forward to grandbabies and now: I found myself doing it again. Without thinking, I finished up their left overs. Not thinking. Not thinking. When I came to, I realized exactly what I had done, reverted back to my past. It honestly was not that many calories (about 350), but what bothered me is that I did not even realize I ate them. I caught myself putting the little toasted cheese sticks in my mouth. Not thinking. I am just not as mindful and aware of what I eat as I think I am. Even after 3.5 months on this journey. I was not present with the food. Present with the kids and or other things, but not with the food. It was an old habit. Eat the left overs. A good reminder to me to be present, and to all of you, in what we eat.

Today I also caught up on reading blog posts. There are a few posts that I would like to mention to all of you my readers and followers: JW at Awake for the Dance had a great post today on empowerment. Many of you know Dr. Fat to Fit, but if you do not, you should and read her genuine post. And to remind us all that you can reach farther than you think, breeze by Joy's post. Thank-you so much for reading. Stay strong in your journey. Michele

10 comments:

  1. Thanks for the kind words as always. This kind of conditioned response to a situation is the hardest to reprogram. I'll bet it doesn't happen the next time those grilled cheese are left on the plate.......mmmmm grilled cheese......
    What? Oh. Live and learn all that stuff.

    You're doing great. The fact that you 1, "woke up and realized it", 2 calculated and counted the calories and 3 were bothered by it are all signs that you are winning this war baby! Good job

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  2. And honesty is what is about. You can fix anything if you are honest and acknowledge it. I am not sure this needs "fixing" so much as maybe a monitoring in the future to keep it from happening. I to used to be a left over picker and when Lauren is done, I still have the urge, but I have for the most part stopped it. If I do, it is seriously just a bite and I do add it to my count, but it would be a good habit to break. I think I will work on it now that you brought it up!

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  3. This is interesting to me because I realize reading it that my mindless eating is not all that mindless. I almost always know that I am doing it, but do it anyways. Hmm. I was craving grilled cheese the other day for some reason. But I am not eating bread right now:(

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  4. I know that kind of slipping back, it happens whenever I lose focus.

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  5. Honesty is my mantra this week! No matter what happens i need to be honest with myself. Despite what someone says, sometimes you don't realize your on a slippery hill going down. As long as you catch yourself and pull yourself back up you will be o.k!

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  6. I know what you mean about "forgetting" and falling into an old pattern. Eating the leftover food shows a desire not to be wasteful and you shouldn't be too hard on yourself. You've been "practicing" for less than four months. Don't forget the meditation mantra: begin again, begin again, and then begin again. I've been "practicing" meditation for 25+ years and I still have to begin again every time my thoughts wander, which is often. So ... the point is that you caught yourself, redirected yourself, and that's what matters.

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  7. I realized that I do the same thing...so I started keeping only things around that can be grabbed mindlessly in a guilt free fashion. LIke grape tomatoes, or turkey pepperoni...just a thought.

    Polar's Mom
    www.polarspage.blogspot.com

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  8. Yep that 's it. When it works "for" us - it's heaven.
    When it works "against" us - it feels like hell.
    But really, it always works FOR us.
    We just don't always like it!

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  9. Great that you realized what you were doing, and WHY. But...love, love, love the grilled cheese!

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  10. This is so true. I got into a trance last night eating kid food - fish crackers - ugh. Back at it today.

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